Airplane Rules

Since I have been doing all of this traveling, I have decided to come up with some rules for flight. I will call them "Abby's Airplane Rules."

  1. No ethnic food of any sort is allowed onto an airplane. 
  2. No removing stinky shoes from your stinky feet for the entire duration of the flight. 
  3. No singing aloud to a song you’re listening to on your iPod.
  4. No undoing your belt or the button on your pants if you are sitting next to me... that’s just weird.
  5. No leaning your body over mine just so you can look out of the window... if you want a window seat, you should ask for one. 
  6. No adjustments are allowed to be made to my air conditioning vent.
  7. No passing any sort of stinky gas out of any orifice of your body... it is recycled air for goodness sake, we all have to breathe it!!!
  8. No sitting near me without chewing a piece of gum or not having a mint in your mouth during the entire flight. 
  9. No telling me about your most intimate and personal problems just because we are strangers on a plane. 
  10. No spraying perfume or body spray. See #7. 
  11. No  falling over onto me or into my space when you are falling asleep. Gross. 
  12. No talking to me when my headphones are in. They are in for a reason probably because you should pop in a mint. 

I think I will start giving a copy of these to the people sitting next to me on the plane. I encourage you to do the same. If all goes well, it should make your flights much more enjoyable. :)