Legal Abortion

I was willing to risk eternity in hell for legal abortion, then I saw one.

I traveled the same route to my house from the Planned Parenthood facility I managed day in and day out. Marshals, that came in to our facility to provide “safety training” for us annually, recommended to us changing our route home. They warned us about how dangerous the pro-lifers were outside our facility. Ha.

You never want to take the same route home. Always change it up. You never know when one of them could be following you,” they said.

I wasn’t too concerned with the pro-lifers outside my facility. I knew them. They knew me. They constantly offered me help and seemed to genuinely care about me. That was annoying. It made it really difficult, if not impossible, to hate the people who were so nice to me, despite the fact that all of my supervisors taught me to hate them.

On September 26, I had witnessed something that had shaken me to my very core, something I could not un-see. I watched a 13 week old baby die by abortion. I watched him struggle for his life, right there before my eyes on an ultrasound monitor.

I was numb, shocked, horrified, and quite honestly, I felt so stupid. How could I have fallen for the lies of this organization?  How could I have let it happen for eight years?

On October 4, I sat in my living room. I held my daughter, and I contemplated. Did I have the guts to admit that I had been wrong for so many years? Did I have the courage to admit that I was a liar? I hate liars, but it hit me that I had been the biggest liar I knew. Could I walk away from my friends? Could I walk away from my huge salary and promise of promotion?

That Sunday afternoon, I didn’t know. I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to be uncomfortable. However, I wasn’t able to justify what I witnessed. I knew I couldn’t rationalize my behavior or my life.

For several years, I had asked myself a question: “If I died, would I go to heaven or hell?” I remember thinking that I would probably go to hell for my active and proud participation in abortion. And somehow, I had convinced myself that it was okay. I was willing to spend an eternity in hell in order to provide abortions.

On October 5, I sat in my office and asked that same question. This time around, my answer changed. No, I was not willing to potentially spend an eternity in hell so that women could continue taking the lives of their children. No, I would no longer be an accomplice to this brutality.

Now, I faced new questions that emerged. Where would I go? Would these pro-lifers really accept me? They always said they would, but how could I believe that? How could they just accept me knowing my past? How could they forgive me for how I had treated them for so many years? I didn’t know what their reaction would be, but there was no going back from here. This was a risk I was willing to take.

So, I took a left instead of a right out of our parking lot. I went to their office. I spilled my guts. I admitted that yes, I had been wrong… so very wrong.

What was their reaction? Well, they forgave me. They haul off on my past faults, naming all of my sins. They didn’t make me beg or force an apology out of me. They simply extended their forgiveness.

I remember after my story hit the national news, a reporter had called and asked to talk to one of the staff members from the pro-life office where I had turned for help. This reporter wanted the scoop. How bad was I when I worked in Planned Parenthood? What were some of the terrible things I had done to them out on the sidewalk?

I expected, and I waited, for all of my embarrassing, dirty laundry to be aired when she answered his questions. Instead, I heard this from her, “I don’t even know that person anymore. Abby is a new creation in Christ and that’s the Abby I want to talk about.”

I never experienced that type of love from a friend, but now I was graced with it from a woman who I had only met three weeks earlier. This is a woman who I had cursed and yelled at. She witnessed the very worst side of me, but here she was offering me this gift of forgiveness.

Certainly, this was a gift that I didn’t deserve from her, but there it was without any strings attached. I often think about that moment.

Can you love people into truth? I definitely think so. I think it really comes down to whether or not you’re willing to love someone that much. Are you willing to put aside their past sins and see the God’s creation that He made? Are you willing to reach out with the love of God, His love and mercy, instead of anger and condemnation?

Are you willing to just meet people where they are and care for them no matter how far they are from where you want them to be? It’s more important where God wants them to be. He has the power to change the hardest of hearts, but can’t we attempt to love our neighbor the way God loves each of us?

Did Christ not say he who is without sin cast the first stone? We owe it to each other to explain where someone through their action is leading a life that could separate them from their Creator for eternity. However, we do not have authority to condemn them because we don’t know the state of their souls. That particular is for God alone because He knows us to our very depths and the fruit we bear in our lives, or lack of fruitfulness. We can know to some degree based on the way someone acts, but we can only correct, or try to correct, bad actions.

It always makes me laugh when I explain to people how many abortion clinic workers leave their facilities through my ministry, And Then There Were None. They are so shocked! They can’t believe 128 people have come to us in the past two years. Who knew these people could have such a profound change of heart? We pray for this to happen, and then when it does, and we are surprised!

Friends, these workers are leaving the abortion industry because they are finally able to see that there is real help for them. They don’t leave because people have told them that they are “baby killers.” They certainly don’t leave because someone tells them they will “burn in hell” for working in the industry. They leave because they are able to receive help from us and are, as well as a and a place to heal. They leave because they want something better for themselves. They leave because we are finally helping them see that we do genuinely care about them.

We need to remember as often as we are able to that people can change, and we always need to hope and pray that they do.  Even if these clinic worker’s or anyone else who chooses evil, are our enemies, Christ calls us to love our enemies more than we love those we love. We are not required to tolerate evil, but we need love those that commit it. Evil cannot be overcome with more evil. They need our prayers for their conversion.

Regardless of how rude they are to us, how much they ignore us, no matter how many times they tell us to “get a job” or something similar, they WILL eventually leave. However, that will only happen if we reflect Christ to them. We don’t have to preach to them. I remember hearing one time that “God is a gentleman.” God will not force Himself on someone, so we shouldn’t either.

Pray. Be kind. Love them. If you don’t think you can love them then stay away from them. The only thing that will keep an abortion worker in the industry longer is a pro-lifer who condemns them.

What if you were the reason an abortion worker took a left instead of a right? It’s possible. I thank God every day of my life for the people who made me “change my route.”

For more information about what you can do to help abortion facility workers, visit And Then There Were None.

*The original article was published by Any reproduction or quotation from this article must give appropriate credit and sourcing to their website. 



This Is Safe Abortion

We talk about "safe abortion."  I have included a complaint, below, by a woman who has now lost her fertility because of a "safe and legal abortion" performed by Dr. Douglas Karpen. 

I would love to tell you that this type of complication is rare, but it is not.  I watched women almost bleed to death on our abortion tables because of our negligence.  It happens so much more than the public knows. 

Please read about this complaint, Mendoza Original Petition, and share it.  We need the truth to get out.